


Something from Nothing

by Name1



Category: The Mandalorian (TV)
Genre: Angst, Boba Fett mentioned, Episode Divergence, F/M, Feelings, Fennec Shand mentioned, Fluff, Happy Ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-13
Updated: 2021-02-13
Packaged: 2021-03-14 01:00:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,848
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29410881
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Name1/pseuds/Name1
Summary: A different take on 'The Believer' if events didn't quite go to plan on Morak.orIt was all a blur. He was gone. She couldn't believe it, but she had watched helplessly as the building blew and the rhydonium along with it. The erupting fireball was on a scale she had only seen a few times before and she knew no one had made it out alive. She must be trapped in a nightmare; that was the only explanation.
Relationships: Din Djarin/Cara Dune
Comments: 20
Kudos: 81





	Something from Nothing

**Author's Note:**

> This week has been ugh….. but I still have about 20 drafts I am working on, so I will be getting back to CaraDin stories for a while :) I also broke the 500k (500,000 word) milestone according to Ao3, so yay to me! A year ago, I thought 5k was a huge number :D

It was all a blur. He was gone. She couldn't believe it, but she had watched helplessly as the building blew and the rhydonium along with it. The erupting fireball was on a scale she had only seen a few times before and she knew no one had made it out alive. She must be trapped in a nightmare; that was the only explanation.

Shand and Fett pulled her back when she tried to go into the burning building. She wanted to see if she could at least find a body but she remembered she wouldn't even recognize his face if she found anyone who was more than ash. 

It had taken all of Boba's considerable strength to physically hold her back and Fennec had to step in too at one point when she almost broke free from his grasp--the building could blow again at any time, they both reminded her. Her ears were ringing, but she remembered in the mayhem them saying their debt to Mando was hers now. She was numb. The armor she was holding for him seemed to triple in weight as she stood there frozen, but the only thought she had was she had to find the kid to keep him safe. She'd make Moff Gideon pay for this..... _for everything_.......and she'd enjoy it.

.....................

It didn't make sense. Nothing made sense. She had lost millions of people, so why did losing one person hurt this much? Maybe because he'd died alone and without his armor--a thought that kept clawing its way to the forefront of her mind. He'd been stripped of everything that could have given him an honorable death. _She should have gone with him_ , she thought, for the hundredth time. She should have _been_ there. She could have done ..... _something........anything_. She hoped when the moment came, it was quick enough that he didn't see it coming--that he hadn't been afraid--that his last thoughts hadn't been of the kid he couldn't save. She felt sick. She thought she might actually vomit in the bushes if it wasn't for Fennec holding onto her arm, preventing her from bending over or making another dash to the burning building.

Today was losing another person she didn't get to say goodbye to; another time she was left alone to carry on. She should have talked him out of the plan or found a better way. She should have convinced him to let Mayfeld go alone. She thought of the last time she'd seen him and how she tried to joke with him to make him feel better; how he'd trusted her with her part of the plan up on the hill, and how he'd trusted her with his most prized possession besides the kid. That moment of teasing was the last time she remembered smiling so hard in forever, but there was nothing to smile about now, and there wouldn't be anything to smile about again. He'd come to her for help and he'd died right in front of her. Fennec and Fett tiptoed around her for days like she was a live grenade, but she didn't want to explode, she just wanted to get away from them to lick her wounds in private. They'd known him too, but she didn't want to share her grief with either of them. 

.........................

She couldn't even make eye contact with Greef when she had to tell him the news. It made her failure even more real. After he moved past his denial--his absolute _insistence_ that she must have gotten the details wrong--Greef then focused on her, telling her over and over that it wasn't her fault.

"You can't carry around this kind of guilt, Cara," he tells her, in the most paternal sounding voice he has. "There's nothing you could have done differently."

"I could have refused to let him go in alone," she argues. "I should have....done something...."

"You did everything you could. You didn't let him down."

It was like she didn't even hear him. She was physically here to deliver the horrible news in person, but her mind was many systems away. "I will find his boy and keep him safe, I swear it. No matter what it takes."

"He wouldn't want you feeling this kind of guilt," he tells her. "He was always so happy when you were laughing."

Cara almost cracked a smile. "It was usually at **_him_** for being an idiot."

Her friend puts his arms around her and chuckles so hard she can feel it through her whole body. "Yeah, it usually was...."

"I wish he was here," she said quietly, when there seemed nothing else to say.

Greef kept his arms around her and was concerned she didn't struggle to break free at all. "I know, we all do, but I'm glad you're alive and standing in front of me, Cara. You could have both been killed and then who would save the kid? Not me, I'm too old, as you always remind me."

She laughs for the first time in over the two weeks it took to get there, but it sounds wrong to be laughing without him here; like she's betraying him by laughing at Greef without him. 

"You didn't let him down Cara," he insists again, as if reading her mind.

He can see how hard she's being on herself. She’s been tortured enough by life, and she doesn’t deserve this, but she looks disgusted at her failure. "I should have done something," she says again, "I should have been there." 

_I should have done something. I should have been there._

_I should have done something. I should have been there_

_I should have done something. I should have been there._

It was the same haunting mantra she'd lived by for years after Alderaan; the one that she stopped hearing over and over again in her head when she'd met Din. The only thing that had drowned it out had been alcohol and fighting, but meeting Din and the kid silenced everything. Now, it was back, and stronger than before. Why was she being punished for surviving **_again_**? Maybe being powerless to watch those she loved taken as she stood by was her punishment for all the bad shit she'd done.....there couldn't be any other explanation. 

Greef kept an eye on her and distracted her as much as he could for a few days before she couldn't put off leaving anymore. He didn't want to let her go until she got her head right, but every day she lingered was another day the kid was in danger--scared and alone. He was her purpose now. Then the armor. The most important thing he owned was now hers and she'd see to it that it was treated as he would have wanted. 

True to their word, Boba and Fennec helped her track Moff Gideon, and it was only when they got close, did she shrug off their help and go off by herself against their better judgement. She found the kid and managed to save him on her own, but almost died in the attempt. The stab wound in her arm had caused her to go septic, but she didn't even feel it over the joy of at least doing one thing Din would have wanted. She didn't have any bacta on hand, but the kid saved her, despite her insistence not to. When she woke up again, the look in his dark eyes broke her heart. He knew Din wasn't there with her. 

"I'm so sorry," she tells him. "He's gone. He tried so hard to find you, but it's just me now." 

She watched sadly as his ears went down. At least they were as miserable as each other, she thought, until she snapped out of it. She didn't want him to be miserable--she wanted him to be happy and carefree and chasing frogs like she knew he loved. She'd see to it he was happy again. She could take all the grief herself and put on a brave face for him so he wouldn't worry about her too. She was good at pretending everything was fine.

She didn't do the baby thing, but she vowed to keep him safe and warm; fed, and clean and protected no matter what. She knew she wasn't half the parent Din had been, but that made sense because she wasn't half of the _person_ he was either. She missed his laugh, his teasing, and the warmth that seemed to follow her when he was around. She'd get the kid to raise those ears back up eventually, no matter what. She'd never replace his dad, but she'd try her best.

She won her own ship in a high-stakes game of dice and sought out other Mandalorians--covert after covert-- until she found the armorer who'd fled Nevarro.

The months she traveled on her quest, she kept his helmet out in the living space so the kid could see it. He seemed to be comforted by it, so she swallowed down her own discomfort at what looked like his severed head sitting on the table always nearby. She talked to Din sometimes, and after a while it felt familiar instead of sad. She knew it was pathetic and probably on the wrong side of a mental breakdown, but it helped to remember the good times. She'd talk to him at night and tell him about their plan and how it was progressing or some funny thing the kid did. She wished her friend was here to help her when the kid's little green antics proved too much for her. As exasperated as she was being thrown into this role, she loved the little guy. She'd protect the kid with her life and for as long as she lived, he'd never be hurt again. She owed that to Din, if not simply the kid himself.

..................................

"You brought this here? How did you manage to find me?" the Armorer asks in amazement, as the ex-dropper stands before her. She was truly astounded this woman had managed to track down not only her elusive people, but herself. 

"It wasn't easy, but it's what Din would have wanted," she tells her, "the armor returned to the tribe."

"You know how much money you could get for this?" the older woman asks, unsure if Cara really knows what she's forfeiting. 

"I could never sell it," she confesses. "It was everything to him."

"Not everything," the Mandalorian said cryptically. "Were you married, when he died?"

"What? No!" The kid peeked his head out of the bag, feeling upset at her raised voice, and she put her hand on his head to let him know there was no cause for alarm. 

"If you were married, you could keep half of it," the other woman explains. "Are you _entirely sure_ you weren't?"

Cara didn't even recognize the attempt to fudge the truth a little for her benefit. She'd never lie about something like that anyway. Din had always been the more honorable one between the two of them, but she was really trying.

"No , we were...." 

She paused to think about what she should say. At the end of the day what were they _really_ in terms that could be explained to others? _Friends. Partners. Family._ Nothing that gave her any claim to anything of his. His son was hers only because he had no one else. "We were....nothing...."

The armorer sighs and Cara wonders if all Mandos have that same mannerism. _Maybe they taught it in Mando school or something._ The woman's voice is softer than before. "You were more than that or you wouldn't have come all this way, looking as forlorn as you do."

Cara thought back to the way they teased each other, the sound of his laughter and how her face hurt from smiling so much those last few days before he.......

She shakes her head. "We weren't anything **_yet_**.....now we'll never have the chance to see." She had thought they were _close_ , that there had been a slight change in the wind, but that made it even worse. It was easier to believe nothing could have grown between them than to believe it was just about to happen or had already started and got cut short. It was easier to lose nothing than to lose the chance at everything. 

"You can keep some for his foundling," the armorer states. "This is the Way."

She finds the offer more generous than she expected. "It belongs here though," Cara insists. "I have his blaster and a piece of his old durasteel plating that he kept." She had handed over the rest of it safely in the duffel bag she'd guarded fiercely all this time, but she lingered handing over his helmet. This would be the last time she looked at his 'face'. It didn't matter she had it committed every inch and every imperfection to memory anyway, she'd just miss having it with her. She presses her face to his helmet in a way she never got to do when he was alive, lets the kid touch it once more, and finally hands it over. 

"You did him a great honor," the Armorer says, but Cara hardly hears any of it over the pounding in her ears. "I don't know anyone who would have gone to the lengths you have."

Cara shakes her head. "A greater honor would have been keeping him alive, but I failed at that. Don't make me some kind of hero."

"You're too hard on yourself," says the mysterious woman in front of her.

_That's what Din would have said too_ , she thought _._ She couldn't stomach this woman's knowing pity or stare another moment. "I'll be going now," she tells her, willing her voice to not waver. Her whole face felt hot and her nose was dripping traitorously onto her upper lip. She had seconds at best before she made a bigger fool of herself by losing control of her tear ducts. "I did what I came to do," she announces, "it's done."

"Stay for a few days," the armorer requests. "If not in the covert, at least in the nearby town". The armorer tries to convince her to linger a while before moving on. "It'll take a week before I can even touch this quantity in the forge, so stay here as my guest. .....please. You look like you could use a rest."

"Just for a few days," she acquiesces. She's too tired to fight with this stubborn woman. "The kid needs a break and some good food, so I’ll stay."

............

She'd tossed and turned all night in her room in the strange village and the poor kid had stayed up with her, no doubt sensing her distress. The next day he zonked out late in the afternoon, so she put him in his carrier and decided to head to the bar. She needed to drown in some liquid comfort so she could get her mind right for the kid-- ** _her_** kid now. She was no mother-of-the-year, but she knew he shouldn't be staying up worrying over her. 'Get your head right Cara', she tells herself. A drink would help with that, and if it's only breakfast and they all stared at her, she couldn't give a fuck.

Half an hour of blissful quiet passed during the time it took her to down four strong drinks. 

She senses someone approach her from behind but doesn't even turn to acknowledge them. She's sober enough to notice, but too drunk to care. _Go on, stab her in the back--that would be the perfect end to a perfect day,_ she thinks. She's not in the mood for people.

"Cara?" a male voice says behind her, and if she hadn't been so miserable, she would have noted the absolute wonder in it.

"Fuck off, I'm not in the mood," she spits at him. She throws the words over her shoulder without even looking behind her. They only sounded a little slurred to her ears. _Unacceptable_. She needed to get drunk--and faster. The kid was safe and asleep in her bag and she deserved to be numb. Her journey had come to an end and now the only parts of Din that remained were gone--not smelted down for another few days, but out of her hands. Only his blaster and his foundling remained with her. Handing over the helmet had been like losing him all over again. 

She hears the idiot's voice again. He must not know when to quit. "Cara? It's me."

"Look," she snarls, finally turning to face the man who addressed her while putting her finger in his almost handsome face. "I don't know who you are or who told you my name, but if you don't back off I'm going to break your face."

"Cara it's me....it's Din."

****Crack****

Her fist slammed into his face and blood poured out of both nostrils. She didn't even remember moving to strike before the sound of his poor nose filled the room.

She pushed into his personal space. "Don't you **_ever_** say that name to me," she hisses through her teeth. "He's dead, you piece of shit."

The man is bent over at the waist, holding his damaged face, but trying to stand back up to convince her to give him a chance. Once she got past the wash of red on his face, she noticed he had dark brown hair and dark eyes. He acted like he knew her, but she had never seen this man before in her life. "Cara, no! It's **_me_** , it's Din." She charged him and he was instantly on the floor with his hands in front of him warding off her attack. Her blaster was in his face primed and whining a high-pitched sound he'd recognize anywhere. 

He speaks faster knowing he has moments before she causes him serious damage. 

"On Sorgan you stepped on my flamethrower. You said we were helping that village for lunch money. You held my hand in Nevarro when the flames were so hot we couldn't breathe. It's me!"

He thought he saw a flash of hope on her face, but then it was gone. She deflated and lowered her blaster from the stranger's face.

"Din's dead," she says. "I watched him die." She didn't know how this man got details of her life unless Greef had been telling stories to random travelers again, but it didn't matter. The surge of hope had already done its damage. She didn't want to drink anymore, and she didn't even want to shoot this guy, she just wanted to go to bed.

"Me and Mayfeld were in the vault," he said quickly, before she decided to bolt or fire her blaster-- _his blaster_. "We knew it was going to blow after the first explosion, so we locked ourselves inside. It took us days to get out of the rubble and twisted metal, and I started searching for you or Fennec and Fett, but your trails were hard to follow." He had one hand out toward her as if trying to convince a wild animal not to attack. The extended hand with flexed fingers that said, " _easy....take a second....calm down_ ," made her freeze. She knew that signal. She stared at his hand. It was covered in blood from her handiwork, but she studies the knuckles, the wrist, and the forearm.....the tiny scar where the dark hair was missing next to his thumb.

She rushed him and he got his hands up to protect his face, but she threw herself at him and wrapped her arms around him instead. He couldn't breathe. 

"I just saw your face, you kriffing idiot." She didn't know how this was possible, but she didn't care. He was alive! Her chest felt like it might explode. Everything was so warm--the rush of heat to her cheeks made her dizzy.

He laughed. "I don't care about that. I haven't worn my helmet in months. You had it, remember? You kept it safe, like you promised."

"The armorer has it now," she tells him in a hurry, "we have to go get it----

"--in a minute....." he says, pulling back just a little to see her before wrapping his arms back around her when it was clear she had no intention of letting go. He still sounds amazed to see her. "I can't believe you're here."

"You can't believe **_I'm_** here?!" she yells, and pushes him back. "I'm going to _kill_ you," she tells him, and proceeds to punch him _hard_. 

"Oww, Cara." He holds his shoulder. "For what?"

"For dying!" She punched him again in the other shoulder--harder this time.

"Then living again!" She punched him again, but it wasn't nearly as hard and he just grinned at her. _That smile_......she didn't recognize his face, but she knew his tone, even so different without the helmet. She knew the ' _sound_ ' of his smile in his voice and the warmth that threatened to suffocate her when he was around was finally seeping back into her. It was really him. His nose was still bleeding from when she decked him, and his teeth were stained pink, but he was smiling like an idiot. _Din was alive._

"I've been following you for months," he tells her, "but I never got closer than a week behind you though. You're fast and stealthy. I was so used to being able to find you, I forgot what it's like when you don't want to be found."

As if she just remembered, she opened the bag on her hip and the kid flung himself at him in an instant. "Kid! Grogu!" he exclaimed in unrestrained joy, "You found him. He's okay!"

"Yeah, I found him..........." _I found him for you._

The kid recognized him straight away and all her doubt was gone. He knew him. Even though he'd never seen his uncovered face, he knew his dad when he felt him nearby. 

"I've missed you," he says, keeping a hold on her arm as if she might disappear in a puff of smoke. "I can't believe I finally caught up with you. I knew I was getting close. I'm glad you took a day to rest or I would have lost your trail again."

"I've missed you, you idiot." She let out a laugh, but it sounded too wet to be convincing that there were no tears involved. She didn't care if he saw--if _anyone_ saw. "You wouldn't believe how much." 

"You can stop missing me now," he murmurs near her face. "I'm here and I'm not going anywhere." 

At the feel of his soft clothes, she remembers his armor again. "We should probably get your armor back before it's melted down and made into a toaster or something."

"Tomorrow," he tells her, laughing and putting his arms back around her and Grogu. "We can do anything tomorrow."

...................

**Author's Note:**

> I'd love to hear from you. I have more drafts in the works, but a lot of them are long so I will not be posting as fast as I would like. Regardless of any current events, I will not be giving up on this ship, and I hope you will all be here too :):):)
> 
> drop me a comment if you like. It would make my day! Also, any specific prompts you'd like to see-- my inbox is always open on tumblr Name1Name1 🥰


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